Sunday Sound-Off v. 82

Shared it:

1. 6 Sweet Survival Tips For Super Sensitive Souls from Rebelle Society.
2. Janell Hofmann shares what you say when your daughter says she's fat via iVillage.
3. An interesting post on, uh... "Bolivia" via Havi at The Fluent Self.
4. Sara shares her point of view in "Stop Shitting On My Lawn" (L.O.V.E. - hat tip to @neeroc for thinking of me!).
5. Cute kids' backseat performances (see? I *don't* hate kids! *snort*)

 I see a dragon. Do you see a dragon?

Appreciated it:

1. The end of a shitty work day
2. (Feeling like) I looked good
3. Listening to Chebbar talk about his day
4. Long weekends
5. TWO walks in one day
6. Watching Pacey play with a friend
7. Going barefoot
8. Clean sheets
9. Clean feet on clean sheets
10. Extra-long gratitude lists

Are We Teaching Our Children, Or Are They Teaching Us?

I was inching my way through the morning commute, minding my own business, when the blue minivan to my left signaled as the driver made her way into my lane (thank Ceiling Cat I was paying attention - don't get me started on people who seem to think that a signal light magically and automatically clears everyone from their paths, rendering the need for shoulder checking null and void).

I slowed down and backed off so she could not hit my bloody car merge into my lane and kept going about my business of singing along to the radio. "Huh," I thought to myself, "no courtesy wave. *sigh* Typical Albertans [sorry, non-typical Albertans]."

Imagine my utter surprise when a tiny little hand popped up from a car seat on the passenger side and WAVED. A child small enough to be in a car seat courtesy-waved! Now, I know: you're all cynical like me and are snorting with derision at my gullibility that this wasn't just a coincidence.

But lo, THEN Mom courtesy-waved. And then another child on the driver's side waved!

Clearly the toddler learned it from someone, and it's logical to assume it was Mom; however, it wasn't until the wee kidlet waved that Mom did.

Source

The student becomes the master? Nice.

If Fat Is "Officially Incurable," Do We All Just Give Up?

Let me preface this post by saying, yes, I know cracked.com is FAR from scientific or scholarly. However, reading their article about fat being incurable ("according to science") initially left me feeling somewhat... relieved. After sharing the link on Twitter and Facebook, the feedback I received was much the same: women I respect were telling me that life got MUCH better when they finally jumped off the "you're too fat to exist" hamster wheel.

My brain took a moment to visualize life without being ashamed of my arms/stomach/ass/thighs. Of taking up too much space. Of pretending to not be fat. Of using the word "fat" to describe myself. "Huh," I thought, "what a change THAT would be! I could eat well because it makes my body feel good, not because I 'should.' I could exercise because it's fun and I enjoy it, not because I 'should.' I could focus on health and well-being once and for all instead of always having the weight loss troll nipping at my heels, mocking me... "

I've spent YEARS holding myself back from life in general, beating myself up for not losing weight (or worse: gaining it), of feeling embarrassed and ashamed and unworthy. I've lost considerable amounts of weight, only to gain it all back and then some. I've wasted time, energy, and life, basically "breaking" my body in the process. 

I woke up the next day feeling... kind of blue. Almost sad. To say I felt something akin to grief wouldn't be pushing it. As much as I hate to admit it, the hope of weight loss has kept me returning to my "good" habits: I can couch it in "health and well-being" as much as I want to, but truth of the matter is that weight loss is always in the back of my mind somewhere. To have that hope taken away (in a manner of speaking) left me wondering what the point was of even trying. WHY make healthy food choices? WHY exercise? Why not just give up and get fatter?

*sigh* Because that's not what I want. Even if I never lose another pound, I certainly don't want to gain more weight because I know I will only be more unhappy with myself; as well, my physical health is actually really good despite my weight - I don't want to screw that up. I don't want to eat nothing but garbage. I don't want to be sedentary with a couch tied to my ass. I want to value myself enough to take care of my body and my health and my self.

Now I just have to strike a balance between not pinning all my hope/motivation on losing weight and giving up to become a sloth, to find a way to accept me for me as I am in this iteration, regardless of whether or not it ever changes (good OR bad).

madamepsychosis / Foter.com / CC BY-NC-ND

What do you think? Do articles like this remove weight from your shoulders (pun not intended)? Or do they feel like a slippery slope to just giving up?

Here's The Thing...

I was going to leave Sunday's fall-out alone; hell, I was going to delete everything that happened Sunday. However, Rebellious Me kicked in and gave me the stink eye.

I've gotten a fair bit of flack, both for what I posted on Twitter (which, it turns out, encompasses what I pinned on Pinterest) and for what I wrote here. Believe it or not, I've struggled with what has been said (written?) to (at?) me.

Here's the thing... yesterday was honest-to-Ceiling-Cat the first time anything childfree crossed my Pinterest stream: it had never occurred to me to look for childfree content before yesterday (so, again, "bad" timing (according to some)? sure).

Here's the thing... I've never used Pinterest as some sort of measuring stick of popularity - I don't care who likes my pin or how many repins I get (I don't even know how to check that now that they've changed their interface); I've always used Pinterest as it was meant: as a personal pin board. As such, it honestly didn't cross my mind who might see my pins and/or take offence - I repinned shit I found funny/true for ME.

Here's the thing... I've never pretended to have anything BUT a skewed and twisted sense of humour.

Here's the thing... subject matter aside (THINK OF THE CHILDREN!), what I posted really wasn't any more controversial or in poor taste than anything else I post that could be deemed questionable content.

Here's the thing... I don't hate ALL children (hell, I don't hate children, period, which is why my decision was a tough one to make). I don't think ALL children are brats any more than I think ALL parents are shitty or selfish: y'all have one of the toughest jobs on earth.

Here's the thing... no matter what anyone says or how it is qualified, someone somewhere will assume it's about him or her and take offence.

Here's the thing... if there was absolutely no truth in what had been said, it likely never would have crossed his or her mind that it might be about him/her.

Here's the thing... I can't control how someone else chooses to react to something I say/write/post: that is on the individual.

Here's the thing... have you stopped to consider whether I find your comments to me disrespectful of MY choice/lifestyle? Because I kinda suspect you haven't.

Am I going to alienate even more people with this post? Very likely. Does that bother me? For some people, yes. At the same time, I'm struggling to figure out why the way I've chosen to voice my lifestyle choice - a choice eve.ry.one. has - is so offensive to those who have chosen the opposite. I'm struggling to figure out the mentality that says I'm only supportive/compassionate/empathetic when I agree with you (but clearly a big, fat disappointment if I have a differing viewpoint). I'm struggling with the urge to apologize or people-please my way out of an uncomfortable situation and standing firm behind my words/actions/posts (because that's how I roll, in case you don't know me very well).

I never had any intention of making this an us vs. them-type issue, some breeders vs. non-breeders thing (for the record, I HATE that term: it is purposefully derogatory and demeaning, and it makes me want to punch kittens). This IS who I am. This IS the decision I've made. This IS how I feel. If YOU dislike me, you are free to wash your hands of me. If YOU disagree with my decision, it's on you to figure out why MY choice about MY life offends you so much. If YOU assume something I say/write/post is about you, that's on you.

I can't control you: I can only control myself.

Sunday Sound-Off (On A Monday) v. 81

Shared it:

1.  The Bloggess shares Rules For Life.
2. 5 Easy Stress Busters via Huffington Post.
3. Why our brains get addicted to the internet (and how to avoid it) from Lifehacker.
4. Allie Brosh of Hyperbole and a Half is back after a long hiatus that left her many fans wondering if she'd ever return and how she was doing. She shared a post about depression that is so spot-on, it's like she crawled inside my brain and put to words everything I couldn't explain or describe. If you or someone you know has ever been depressed, read it. Hell, even if you haven't been or known someone who's been depressed, read it: it will help give you an understanding of what we go through...
5. ...otherwise, you might sound like this:

 Morning clouds: no filter.

Appreciated it:

1. Painting my toes for the first time this year (even if it looks like a blindfolded, drunk two-year old did it)
2. A good day at work
3. Pleasant conversations with strangers while in line at Walmart
4. A clean yard
5. My Chebbar - happy (belated) birthday, babe!