Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Nick went to live with Dad, and Mom and I moved in with my grandparents - a recipe for disaster. I found myself at School #3 of 9. I wasn't aware of it at the time, being that I was only seven years old, but things were very... strained between my mother and her parents (well, her mother, natch). I don't know how long it was, but Mom ended up moving out not long after we moved in, leaving me with her parents.
On the surface, this probably wouldn't seem like too bad of a deal, considering I was doted on, showered with attention, and spoiled rotten. Until you factor in Grandmonster's manipulation.
I remember her telling me that Mom left me there.
I remember her telling me that Mom left me there because she didn't want me anymore.
I remember her telling me that Mom had to quit her job before she was arrested for stealing from the company (total, complete, 100% falsehood).
I remember her telling me that Mom had stolen money from the piggy bank that Grandmonster and Gramps used to collect change that they would deposit into bank accounts for Nick and I (she went so far as to "show" me the half-full piggy bank - also a complete falsehood).
I remember her repeating history with the pill popping.
I remember her being so stoned, she'd careen down the hall and smash face-first into door frames, giving herself black eyes.
I remember her picking a fight with Gramps late one night in a pill-induced stupor, running out the door, and peeling off in the truck with screamed threats of killing herself.
I remember her coming home the next morning with a small tree in the back of the truck that she ripped out of the ground and stole from a neighbour's yard.
I remember having hernia surgery on my mother's birthday when I was 8, and Grandmonster telling me that Mom wasn't at the hospital and didn't come to visit because she didn't care (my mother didn't know I was having surgery: she found out the day she called the house).
I having Grandmonster tell me that Mom only called because it was her birthday, not because she was worried about me.
Things weren't all bad. As I mentioned, I was doted on: I had the luxury of going back to being treated like I was an only child again. I thrived at school. I made new friends. I got the chicken pox. I got my Pound Puppy. I was able to put most of the shit out of my mind. I started to like it there, to feel at home.
The day my parents showed up - together - I knew something was up when I was sent to my room. I stood in there with the light off and the door closed, feeling the stuffy summer heat wrap around me, suffocating me. I didn't yet know what, but I felt like something "bad" was going to happen. When Mom came into my room by herself, closing the door behind her, and kneeling down to my level, I knew something "bad" was about to happen.
She told me that Mommy and Daddy were going to move to [another new city] with Nick, and didn't I want to come, too?
No, no I didn't. Even at 8, I knew I had a pretty sweet deal going, what with being Granny's Little Princess and all. I don't remember throwing a hissy fit or anything - I was a people pleaser even back then. I just went along, feeling completely conflicted: I was happy that my family was together again and that I was part of it, but I missed my grandmother something terrible.
I started School #4. Mom became pregnant with Taylor. Mom and Dad fought a lot. Nick and I fought a lot. Life went on.
The hard part is really knowing and understanding what someone like your Grandmonster was up to - what her agenda was. And as a kid- it's just impossible. All that does is fuck with a kid's mind - and that just isn't fair.
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