Last night I read Dianne Sylvan's "Ten Rules for Fat Girls" on her blog, Crazy Beautiful. The first few lines of Rule #8 (Deal with Your Fat) really caught my attention: "Don’t pretend to be skinny if you’re not. Take up space. It’s okay. You’re not fooling anyone by sucking in your gut anyway."
Don't pretend to be skinny if you're not. I've been living that way for more minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, YEARS than I care to count. I've been walking around like an embarrassed and apologetic skinny girl trying to hide the fact that she's
I've allowed this shame about my body to rule my life and hold me back. It's been miserable, and I'm done. I'm done feeling embarrassed by the shell that houses my soul. I'm tired of feeling ashamed of myself simply because my body doesn't hold up to the ridiculously unobtainable and heavily altered pictures in magazines. Because fact of the matter is that I've felt like a "moose" ever since my mom called me one when I was 12 - even at 125lbs in high school I was wearing size 12 pants: despite my short stature, I've never been tiny.
So, I'm gonna live my life like the big girl I am. The one with a great rack and rockin' curves and an ass that looks great in those jeans. I'm going to stop trying to squeeze myself into size X with shame staining my face red just so I can deny that I do need to step into the "full-figured" section depending on the cut of the season. I'm going to stop blaming my body for the things I "can't" (read: feel too insecure to) do. I'm going to do my level best to love who I am on the inside and treat the outside with respect - after all, I would never stop cleaning my house or washing my car, so why should I stop taking care of my body (which CAN'T be replaced, unlike a house or a car)?
This isn't to say that I'm going on a great, big I-don't-care-a-thon: I'll continue making the best food choices I can, getting exercise of one form or another on a regular basis, and listening to my body. I think if I start treating it with a modicum of respect, it might surprise me.
You are the Woman!
ReplyDeleteYes! Love this!
ReplyDeleteHoney, you are beautiful just the way you are!
ReplyDeleteThis is something I STILL struggle with...I kinda feel bipolar about it sometimes, going from hiding and shrinking to saying "hell no, here I am...all of me!" But you're right...this is about respect for our whole selves!
ReplyDeleteYou make me furiously happy! And I am here cheering for you. :)
ReplyDeleteI'm a "big-boned" gal myself and proud of you for this! Reading this stirred up a lot of mxed feelings inside me (future blog post). We have to do the best with what we've got and not all of us are destined to be thin. You are taking the steps to keep building your self esteem which is a long road. I'm off it more than I'm on it. Hang in there. You've got a great support system on social media!
ReplyDeleteAwesome outlook, Chibs! You SHOULD present yourself like the rocking person you are, whatever size your tag may read:) (But I *know* that's hard to do some days)
ReplyDeleteI must be a "mostly-figured" gal. Yes? LOL. & yeah, I was wearing a size 9 in 6th grade, & measuring less than 5' tall. (4'10&3/4" at the start of that school year, when I was 11.6 yo. Heh.)
ReplyDeleteHooray! I read that last night [after you linked it] and loved it.
ReplyDeleteSo glad you're inspired! Clothes that don't fit are unfortunate, indeed. I know there has been a few times [at least] when I've been surprised and saddened by a cute something that did not fit anymore, in a painfully obvious way. [This top used to cover my belly, WTF?] ;p
xoxo
I have always thought that women were made to feel guilty about taking up space as part of the centuries old women-bashing that will never abate until women stop supporting it. Have you noticed how men sit with their legs w-i-d-e open increasing their bulk and size whilst women were always encouraged to cross legs and keep everything minimal? Expand that to women dieting themselves into weak, dependent beings, their minds all befuddled and confused by lack of nourishment and loss of who they used to be.
ReplyDeleteI think making women feel ashamed of everything that is intrinsically woman is just more of the same. Fat that gathers naturally and genetically in places for feeding offspring - evil. Natural body hair growth - evil. Intelligent women - evil. Dumb women - great. From countries that forbid women to be educated to countries that promote and eulogize women who aren't too sharp every night on TV.
I believe what you said and if YOU really believe what you have said then you would have beaten 'them'. To really beat them you will have to stop investing in their messages from TV, magazines and blogs.
Have I told you lately that I <3 you?? Everything...I love! You help me to remember to be nice to myself. I don't often forget...but sometimes I do...
ReplyDeleteLove that!! Love love love! Own it, sweetheart. :) We'll be sexy mamas together. :)
ReplyDeleteI *so* need to read this. I'm done feeling ashamed and embarrassed of myself. Because it's bullshit. Thanks for a great post!
ReplyDeleteNew reader...great post! The last time I went clothing shopping I decided to just buy the bigger sizes...just DO it. Buy what fits ME. I gotta say, that was the most enjoyable shopping trip I've ever had because I looked good in what I put on. Good luck!!
ReplyDeleteGood for you, you full-figured godess!
ReplyDelete<3
ReplyDeleteI think that it's a good idea to start to accept your body how it is. If you're making great food choices, great movement choices, AND you're loving yourself, there is nothing else that matters.
Obviously Chebbar loves you for the size you are, for the person you are, and for the hilarious stuff you say and share. Your friends (me) love you because you have a glowing personality. You're supportive and a wonderful friend.
Those things shine through no matter how you stand or what shirt is worn. <3
Lovely, made me smile!
ReplyDeleteI wish I could do this. I really wish I could. I'm so happy that you are!!!
ReplyDeleteI think that is a great outlook to have!
ReplyDeleteI think you are gorgeous and wonderful and it makes no damned difference to me if you are 415 or 115 lbs. I love you
ReplyDelete